As the days past by..

being fine

2008-10-12T11:36:00.004+08:00

The Used - All that i've got

know i know where i stand.

2008-09-03T20:44:00.007+08:00

baby d,
Now I know it's true,
cos my every road leads to you
&& in the seconds, minutes or hours in a day,
Your silly-ness gets me through.
&& if it''s just you,
just you who i want.
&& if it's just you,
just you..i'll always belong to.

by:
Fred.

just one of those days.

2008-08-22T00:39:00.002+08:00

I'll be there for you through it all,
even though if saving you sends me to heaven.

this is weird cos
i think im falling deeper for you.
which is bad.
cos i know there wont be an outcome.

Bubbles burst.

2008-08-19T21:32:00.002+08:00

sigh.
america is no longer an option for me.
fuck this world.
peace out.

Nice try.

2008-08-18T19:55:00.004+08:00

haha i almost got fooled.
she suddenly called and i was like wow.
thats random and it's too good to be true if she just wanted to just talk.

haha LIN TIAN CHER! i know it's your idea!
you asshole. but nice one. haha!!

she said.

2008-08-16T01:43:00.004+08:00

"hey. can we go out on another day instead of tomorrow. sorry."
well i felt a lil upset. but i suppose everyone have their reasons..
im cool with it. whats not cool is i feel bad cos i actually made reservations for dinner. lol.

anyways,
we got custom made stickers for our rides.
credits to john & myself.

THE CREW: ROUND ABOUT

Happy go lucky.

2008-08-15T03:32:00.002+08:00

nothing much to update i suppose.
but will update tomorrow.
cos tomorrow will be a very very good day for me. =D

letting it out.

2008-08-10T18:21:00.002+08:00

you know what it's like getting up every morning feeling hopeless?

feeling like the love of your life is waking up with the wrong man

but at the same time, hoping that she still finds happiness,

even if it's never gonna be with you?

well, i do. thats for sure.

Vaio

2007-10-31T03:39:00.002+08:00

some really stupid stupd post!
david came over with his vaio.
it crash && we planned to fix it.

here's the intresting fact!
we fixing it?! LOL.

meet my dog, Fuji. 30mins before.

15 mins later..(first half)

15 mins later..(2nd half)
SWEET AIN'T THEY?

haha. can't sleep though.
i keep thinking of you.
fixing of vaio here i go! zzzZzzZZzzzZZZZzzz

Random

2007-10-30T03:51:00.000+08:00

well i just find this cute. don't you think so? =D

I CAN'T FUKIN SLEEP! HAHA

2007-10-29T05:15:00.001+08:00

as mentioned above.

well yesterday was rather bored or maybe it's just me.
was supposed to go clubbing with wei da or john for hallowen party!
do feel like going but somehow i just know i won't enjoy myself not because
i don't really club and all but i just feel empty.
yes EMPTY! not really empty but like errs???!?!??!? you know that feeling
where you feel a part of you ain't with you? yea..i guess it's because of her.
so instead of rottin at home i went out with 18th floor(Jensen).went over to kws place to chill!
and we did crazy things there. partly cos i'm depressed. and party cos jensen is crazy? haha!
shit my brain ain't workin right now. can't really think. lol. actually, seriously seriously!
i don't know what im typing down i guess? lol.

who cares.

At 18 floor's house waitin for him to get rdy as usual. so i got myself busy..

wei xiong called! picked us up and went for dinner!

and after that he dropped us at kws place.zzzzzzzzzzz
this entry sounds boring!
blah blah blah!

Update!

2007-10-29T04:49:00.000+08:00

finally!!! after 9587264758234238957239852370952704319841 HOURS! I FINISHED
RE-CREATING MY NEW BLOG TEMPLATE! ARGH!!!

well will update tomorrow! need some fukin sleep!

random..

2007-10-23T06:09:00.001+08:00

somehow i just love this picture.

Random

2007-10-23T06:09:00.000+08:00

somehow i love this picture a lot.
[IMG]http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l274/kkioz/123456.jpg[/IMG]

feelings

2007-10-23T06:04:00.001+08:00

i miss you girl..

letters of Regrats

2007-09-01T14:54:00.000+08:00

sigh..
i made a huge big mistake..
well i shouldn't have let her go,
i shouldn't encourage her to be with him?
why do i love her so much and still!
still i let her go?
is it really okay to let a person go as long as their happy?
but the outcome was a heart break.
i mean i knew the outcome would be like that
not only me, but even her friends told her.
well 1 things for sure?
that guys a god damn basket!
lol. X____X
(if you guys read my previous entries)

She once said she's confused between me and him
and knowing the outcome ain't gonna be good for em.

You asked me but i never had the courage to say:
I think you should do what ever you think is right.
well even if you really want to hear it from me,
you should tell him that he already violated your trust!!!!!)*$&*&$
Also you should tell him the time you spend with him previously,
should be sufficient for him to decide or not
whether to take this relationship,
BUT!!&$*#$
That he's obviously UNABLE to make that sort of commitment.
which maybe fine to him.
but you're worth more respect than that.
You should let him know that you found THIS GUY.
that you think might be the one,
A guy that maybe doesn't always communicate,
what he's feeling about you all the time
but IM working on it.
Such as the fact that he just told you
he's fallen in love with you.
and if you go back with him,
it might just kill him..
even though this is sudden and way too soon.
and even though that "THIS GUY" refers to me
all the time.

IM asking you to be together with ME,
right now.
because i know i can be better than him.
and I Love You.

I really do

2007-08-29T12:51:00.000+08:00

I think about you.
I dream about you.
I still want you
yes i still,
baby i need you like i've never need anyone before.
I miss spending those times with you,
I still wanna be kissed by you,
Wanna be loved by you.
I want a life with you
BECAUSE
I STILL LOVE YOU.
I REALLY DO.

I need you like i've never needed anyone before.

2007-08-28T21:17:00.001+08:00

Im left with a photo of me and you
accompanying myself being alone all day
silently worning out
i think you've have shown it perfectly clear,
i understand and i know you're willing to..
you said you'll be sad but i don't believe it
accompanying me & holding my hands yesterday(26 of Aug 2007)
was like before.
i hope that he really loves you more than i do
So i forced myself to leave you.
you want me to say it
but
it's hard on my part.
WHEN
I dont even want us to separate.
and why do i still replace my sadness
with a smile?
when i really don't have that talent
being with you and then accepting him.
you don't have to worry too much
because i can manage on my own.
you've gone so far away
&&
i slowly walked away
BUT
why do i still hold you when i should be leaving?
because i really don't have that skill
to remain silent so soon.
i can't learn how to give you up
it's because i STILL love you so much
thats why i can't leave you.

Nor Noi Lei.

learning to love myself more

2007-08-27T04:57:00.000+08:00

That day was named 14 of july.
that snore we made,
those hugs we had,
that kiss you gave me on that cab.
everything happened like it was yesterday.

Now am i only left with a option,
to be your friend?
being alone all day at home,
silently hurting myself.
I think you have shown it perfectly now,
understanding and know what you are willing to do.
you said you be sad but i dont know.

At first i thought
But now i hope...
&& i forced myself
&& said that he really loves you more than i do.
Forced myself to leave you,
to make me or you? forget about everything.
You want me to cheer up
but it's hard on my part,
WHEN
I dont even want us to separate.
im trying so hard to fit that mask on my face,
to replace sadness with a smile.
But somehow it just doesn't fit.
i'm not born with a talent being with you and then accepting him.
You don't have to worry too much
Because i can manage on my own? (i don't know)
he showed himself and made us apart
&& slowly you walked away.
Understanding the importance of those five words
"i'll be there for you".
But when you're with him
do you feel it? (seems like a no)

Silently holding onto you
But why do i still want to hold onto you?
when i know i should be leaving,
maybe it's because i really don't have that skill
to remain silent so soon.

I really wish i can learn how to give you up,
BUT!
I know i love you so much.

I Live My Life For You.

2007-08-23T13:43:00.001+08:00

i feel this song..

'm a fake!

2007-08-23T02:12:00.000+08:00

sigh...
finall she told me how she felt.
well is it the truth?
i seriously don't know only time will tell..
it's not like im telling myself i still stand a chance.
but this is what i think..

she's stressed and presurred thats why she said that..
i mean that can be true you know.

don't you guys just #*$)%&@#%!$%$&$*#~~!!@
most of times when lets say for example..
you're talking with your mom abt some important stuffs.(lets assume she wans say impotant stufs)
and your bestfriend ring your cell..
you thought it was jus gonna take a while
but he/she ended up crying..

you know that kinda thing? lol.

well i feel so depressed right now.
i don't know what to do..
all i know is that i love her and i don't want to lose her the 2nd time.
till now even after she said that.
i seriously don't know what to do.
she told me feelings for me fade away.
i asked her is it a 100% comfirm that there's no more me in her heart?
she said yes. ='(*
and still there's a saying:
It TAKES A SECOND TO FALL IN LOVE
BUT
IT TAKES FOREVER TO FORGET A PERSON
if that's true..
then why is this curse casted on me?
maybe im just unlucky.
NAH IM UNLUCKY AS USUAL.
well only time will tell.

damn it!
i can't continue anymore.
im gonna try to end my life again..i've done it once.
i can do it again.

I Love You Still

2007-08-21T05:31:00.000+08:00

though lots of things happened
but i still love you..
i've already lost you once!
I WON'T WANT TO LOSE YOU THE 2ND TIME!

well i guess cre-8-in a blog is cool.
it's like a place where i feel i can express how i really feel.
sigh..so what if i blog all these down?
im never gonna tell her about these.

you know how much it hurts me?
im suffering from pain everytime when you get your heart broken from that asshole.
YEAH THAT ASSHOLE!
i don't know why they say love is selfish.
it is i know..
but im so fukin dumb to do this..
i told you that i love you and yet look how dumb am i..
telling you to go for him.
ain't love suppose to be selfish?
im trying my best to be selfish but somehow i just can't.
and what happens now?
i lost you..
i regrated doin it..
i really love you.

that kiss
that hug
those times we spent
those memories we shared
those smiles we made
those words we use

everything gone now?
please tell me is it really the end?

That "Jasmin" Flower

2007-08-21T05:09:00.000+08:00

why?!
why must things turn out like this?
this world is so fukin unfair! damn it!
i've lost you once and i won't want to lose you again.

sigh..ever came across when you && that special someone
share a bond and it's going on well?
but after 2 months some ex of his/hers came out of no where &&
it just sucks when they say they suddenly remembered him/her
and actually loved him/her all along?

things got so different right after that..
she started avoidin me..
not returnin ma calls && texts..
we seldom talk on the phone..
every text she sent is like as if we're strangers.

she said that guy was a busted.
she got fooled by him && still she wants him now?
i mean i can't blame you for loving him more then me
i've never blame you i just felt that this is unfair.
but thats what life is all about right?
can someone explain to me?
why is it when someone so selfish busted you for the first time
and you want to give em a 2nd chance?
since you know whats comin your way..
why do you still want to be with em?
i don't understand..love is so complicaited.